Friday, October 23, 2009

Is it weird?

Dear Friends,

There are so many thoughts that I have and I want to share. I don't know where to begin!

Is it weird that I want to share my thoughts on how I feel so much anxiety that I am not raising my children with patience?

What I mean is this. I love my kids. They are by all accounts great kids. Kind, loving, cute -BUT why don't they listen to me? Why? Of course that is a rhetorical question - some days all I do is yell. The guilt I feel when I put my head down some nights is just crazy. When I only had one child and my mother was still alive she used to tell me that guilt was such a useless energy. Just do the best you can. So that is what I try to do. I start each day with "I am going to do better today then I did yesterday".

But you know what is funny? I thought I was the only one that felt this way, that reacted this way - but I am not. Some days the anxiety is overwhelming. Do I need medication? How does my best friend do it with 6 kids and working fulltime do it? So I am making a new commitment.

As some people know I have gone green in my life for about 11 years. But there is so much to doing things naturally through vitamins, exercise, taking all the cleaning chemicals out of my house and just talking about it - like now. So I am going to take the natural approach to lowering my anxiety. Instead of taking the medication that my doctor prescribed, I am going to try and take a natural vitamin. I would only do this through a reputable company - with a proven track record. And through conversation. So I will let you know how all that goes.

In the mean time - Is it weird I want to share with all of you what is working in my life. What isn't - and is it weird I want to hear back from all of you?

Well guess what - I don't care if it is weird, because I do want to hear from you - how did you get through situations that we all are experiencing? What are you going through? How do we stick together for support?

I am anxious to put this together and create conversation. I have reached a time in my life that you realize that there is so much we can bring to the table and we shouldn't be shy or worry about what others think!

Chow friends - talk with you soon, and please share!